A Letter to Survivors of Child Sexual Abuse

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Chaygit Cutler


He touches her in places she covers
Yet tells her to be modest

He insists she lies to protect his lies
Yet expects her to stay truthful

He breaks her spirit repeatedly
Yet demands she stay religious

He causes her physical pain
Yet judges her when she hurts herself

He misuses his position and power
Yet instructs her to trust the leaders

He exposes her to adult information
Yet expects her to remain innocently childlike

He breaks the most sacred religious laws
Yet insists she fears and believes in G-d.

He promises her this is love
Yet it feels like a punishment
For a crime she distantly remembers knowing she didn’t commit

‏And all the people wonder
Why she is disconnected
Why she is confused
And why she is angry

And even when she told them
They had heard, but hadn’t listened 
And they didn’t realize
He had killed her long before she died

Chaygit Cutler is a 36-year-old mum of two boys. She grew up in Stamford Hill, London and currently lives in Golders Green. Chaygit can be reached on Instagram @chaygit